Fear is an Empty Page

I'm on the verge of starting a new novel (writing not reading).  Well, I'm actually a bit past that.  I had intended on starting a couple of weeks ago, but something got in my way . . . FEAR.

I'm not the kind of writer that uses outlines.  I lean a bit more toward free writing.  I know this causes all the outliners to gasp and shake their heads.  What about the plot holes?  The dead ends?  The run on writing?  Truth is, that's not what I'm afraid of.  Free writing comes natural to me and some of my best ideas come straight out of the blue.

What is it that scares me, then?  A blank page does.

Once I get words down on paper (more like computer screen) then my muse usually kicks in and the story unfolds on its own.  Now, that's not to say I don't hit snags that have to be fixed in the rewrites, but most often the Fear stays away.

But it's the moments just before starting, the time when you sit down to a blank page and search for the perfect opening line, that gets me.  That's when I start second guessing my muse.  Are you sure I shouldn't write this thing in first person?  Should this character live or die?  Is a mutant dragon/unicorn really necessary to my YA Police/Doctor drama with sparkly swamp creatures that teach children to do taxes?

The problem is, this new novel has a few elements that I've never tried before.  It's dystopian, it's the first in a series, and the horror aspect of the story has the capacity, if not done right, to come of as hackneyed and b-rated.

So, here I sit, procrastinating, second guessing, staring at a blank page.

If You Dream It . . .

It's no big secret that I'm a HUGE Jim Carrey fan.  I remember seeing this guy flail around on stage during his stand up, or drive me into fits of hilarity while he was on In Living Color.  Even back then, I knew he was going to be something special (like most everyone else).

Now, don't get me wrong.  I don't stalk the guy, but I do find him very interesting.  Below is an interview with Mr. Carrey.  Pay special attention to his story about the bike.  It is a wonderful testament to the power of positive thinking, and I believe it applies to all of us reaching for a dream.

My dream?  To be the self-published Stephen King.  Lofty goal, I know, but I'm putting it out there.  I'll continue to work my butt off and see what doors open to me.

Don't be afraid to speak your dreams aloud.  You never know who might be listening.

What Else Can I Say?

So, I've been considering weighing in on the DoJ's case against Apple and five of the Big Six, but there is so much out there already.  Needless to say, I am taking the DoJ's side in this, and not just because I'm a self-pubber.

There is plenty of Amazon-bashing going on, and I just don't understand it.  Yeah, they are a powerhouse, but they seem to be the only one that is working to improve both the writer's and the reader's experience.

But it's late and I spent the day digging large rocks out of my yard, so I think I'll defer this to three people that can blog circles around me.

Nathan Bransford tackles the subject in his post What Will the Book World Look Like After the DoJ Lawsuit?

Then there is the ever-vocal Joe Konrath and his post The Agency Model Sucks.

And lastly is David Gaughran's Don't Be Fooled: Big Publishing Hates Competition.

Sorry for phoning this post in, but my hands hurt and I really need to get to bed.  If these three can't convince you that the Big Six don't care about you, then there isn't much I can say that will.